With the milestone of the tribute behind me, Coco and I are taking the next step on our journey – traveling back to Costa Rica, the place Steve and I called home for much of the year before all hell broke loose in July last year. I have heard that after the death of a spouse, the surviving partner often finds it comforting to continue living in the shared home.
Everything is infused with the presence and memory of the beloved. The familiar setting helps to soothe the raw nerves and the broken heart. I wonder what it will be like for me. Will I hate it there and go crazy feeling the loss of Steve everywhere? Or will I feel good, finally to be back at the place we both nourished, loved and cared for very deeply? Or maybe it will be a bit of both.
Coco for sure will be super happy! The many neighborhood dogs are her friends, she is free to roam, there are beach visits and swims in the warm ocean every day, sunbathing on the hot lawn, barking at monkeys in the trees… life is good! Coco will be my gentle guide into this new experience, and help me with presence and joie de vivre as only a dog can!
As with trembling knees I gather my strength once again, I pledge to go forth with as much awareness as I can muster, and to be open to life and the love of my friends and community there; here and everywhere.